Hi Reader I hope you had a fabulous start to 2025! I surely did, but I'm already failing in one New Year's resolution, and that is getting back into the flow of keeping in touch with you via the Backyard Gossip 🫣 In my defence, I'm still finding my way into this new chapter of my life: MBA studies at Vancouver Island University, Canada, 1:1 coaching, Visionary Women, discovering the Island and building connections! The MBA program started three weeks ago, and I've been loving it (I write this purposefully, as this might change in the coming weeks 🤣). For various reasons, we are a very small class of 18 students from 10 different nationalities. Nope, not the big aulas, as I know them in Belgium. Therefore, there is NO hiding between 300 other students. Also, skipping classes is not an option. Yes, I know I didn't move across continents to skip classes 🙄 but just having the option right... The good part is that we get a very personalized approach and that I already know everyone in my class. We have a good group dynamic going, but... ... there is also one person who triggers me. And it's hard to get out of this person's way as we are stuck with each other for the next 18 months. I'm sure you have found yourself in the same situation before; ok, maybe not in an MBA classroom with 17 other students, I get that 😅 But you know what I mean. Perhaps a colleague, someone in the family, or a friend from a friend that evokes a strong emotional reaction in you. It almost seems that you've become a total stranger, even to yourself. Obviously, I don't want it to get out of hand, so after some introspection, I will invite X to go for coffee. I feel that the trigger goes both ways; we hold different beliefs and values, so I hope that by acknowledging that, we can hold some space for each other and make this coming time as smooth as possible. This approach might seem a bit daunting for you, so here are some other things to go to if you get triggered by someone. Just remember this: when someone triggers you, it’s an opportunity for self-awareness and growth. Here’s a step-by-step approach to handle it: 1. Pause and Breathe: Take a moment to ground yourself. Deep breaths can help you calm your emotions and avoid reacting impulsively. 2. Identify the Trigger: Reflect on what specifically about the person or situation is triggering you. Is it their behaviour, tone, or a value clash? 3. Understand Your Reaction: Ask yourself: Why does this bother me? Often, triggers point to unresolved issues, personal insecurities, or unmet needs within ourselves. 4. Empathize: Try to see things from their perspective. This doesn’t mean you have to agree, but understanding their motives or challenges can reduce tension. 5. Set Boundaries: If the trigger is recurring, decide what boundaries you need to feel comfortable and respected. Communicate these clearly and assertively if necessary. 6. Focus on Yourself: Shift your attention to your own values, goals, and mindset. Don’t let someone else’s behaviour derail your progress. 7. Learn and Reflect: Use this experience as a lesson. What did it teach you about yourself? How can you manage similar situations in the future? 8. Let It Go: Holding onto anger or frustration only harms you. Practice letting go, whether through journaling, talking to a trusted friend, or mindfulness exercises. Triggers can be challenging, but they also offer valuable insights into your personal growth journey! Peggy P.S. I've got two 1:1 Forward Focus coaching spots opening up in February. Book your discovery call today and find out how I could be your guide in your journey! That is at least, when we don't trigger each other 🤣 |
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View in browser Hi ReaderBy now, you know walking is a big part of my life. It’s how my coaching journey started, by reconnecting with nature and, eventually, myself. Hence the name, a Backyard Hiker, if you didn't make that connection yet 😊 First, it was giraffes and acacia trees, and then walking alongside my coaching clients. A lot of magic happens when you move. This week, something happened that reminded me of the power of a walk. When walking on campus, I noticed a classmate a few...
View in browser Unlike many others, my coaching journey didn’t begin in a classroom. It began with dirt trails, sunrises, and unexpected clarity. Back in South Africa, I started going for a walk every single day. One day turned into two… which turned into a habit… which turned into a non-negotiable. Today marks Day 1888 of #walkingeverydamnday. And while those walks once included giraffes, zebras, and the occasional wildebeest (yep, really), these days, my wildlife encounters look a little...
View in browser Hi Reader How have you been? I'm about to embark on the second half of the second semester of my MBA, and I had a fantastic break! No, not a summer break, just a one-week break 😅 That summer is on hold as an MBA student at Vancouver Island University 😏 In the past few weeks, a topic that came up repeatedly was the need to start making connections! But you know what, as kids, we’re told not to talk to strangers. Don’t trust them. Don’t follow them. And definitely don’t tell...